Jokes
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The Three Generals

The pentagon said they had too many generals running around, so they decided to get rid of some of them. They offered $10,000 in severance pay for each inch of their body -- to be measured however they chose.

The Air Force general went first. He said he wanted to be measured from his head to his toe. He was 69 inches. He received $690,000.

Next up was the Army general. He wanted to be measured from the tip of his finger to the tip of his other finger. It was 80 inches. He received $800,000.

The two generals were very happy with their earnings.

Finally the Marine general came up. He said he wanted to be measured from the tip of his d**k to the tip of his balls. The man said, ''Sir, do you know how much the other generals received?''

The general said no. ''Sir, they received $690,000 and $800,000 respectively, are you sure that is what you want measured?''

The general said, ''Just do it!''

The man dropped the general's pants and measured his d**k. When he went for the general's balls, they weren't there. The man said, ''Sir, where are your balls.''

The general said, ''I left them back in Vietnam.''

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